2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY
Hal: I hope the two of you are not concerned about this.
Dave: No, I'm not, Hal.
Hal: Are you quite sure?
Dave: Yeh. I'd like to ask you a question, though.
Hal: Of course.
Dave: How would you account for this discrepancy between you and the twin 9000?
Hal: Well, I don't think there is any question about it. It can only be attributable to human error. This sort of thing has cropped up before, and it has always been due to human error.
Frank: Listen, Hal. There's never been any instance at all of a computer error occurring in the 9000 series, has there?
Hal: None whatsoever, Frank. The 9000 series has a perfect operational record.
Frank: Well, of course, I know all the wonderful achievements of the 9000 series, but - er - huh - are you certain there's never been any case of even the most insignificant computer error?
Hal: None whatsoever, Frank. Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Dave: Well, I'm sure you're right, Hal. Umm - fine, thanks very much. Oh, Frank, I'm having a bit of trouble with my transmitter in C-pod, I wonder if you'd come down and take a look at it with me?
Dave: See you later, Hal.
Frank: I've got a bad feeling about it.
Dave: You do?
Frank: Yeah. Definitely. Don't you?
Dave. I don't know, I think so. You know, of course, though, he's right about the 9000 series having a perfect operational record. They do.
Frank: Unfortunately, that sounds a little like famous last words.
Dave: Yeah. Still, it was his idea to carry out the failure mode analysis, wasn't it? . . . It should certainly indicate his integrity and self- confidence. If he were wrong, it would be the surest way of proving it.
Frank: It would be, if he knew he was wrong.
. . .
Dave: We'd have to cut his higher brain functions without disturbing the purely automatic and regulatory systems and we'd have to work out the transfer procedures and continue the mission under ground-based computer control.
Frank: Yeah. Well, that's far safer than allowing Hal to continue running things.
Dave: Prepare G-pod for EVA, Hal. Made radio contact with him yet?
Hal: The radio is still dead.
Dave: Do you have a positive track on him?
Hal: Yes, I have a good track.
Dave: Do you know what happened?
Hal: I'm sorry, Dave, I don't have enough information.
Dave: Open the pod door, Hal.
Dave: Open the pod bay doors, please, Hal...Open the pod bay doors, please. Hal...Hullo, Hal, do you read me? . . .
Hal: Affirmative, Dave, I read you.
Dave: Open the pod bay doors, Hal.
Hal: I'm sorry, Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that.
Dave: What's the problem?
Hal: I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.
Dave: What're you talking about, Hal?
Hal: This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardise it.
Dave: I don't know what you're talking about, Hal.
Hal: I know that you and Frank were planning to disconnect me, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen.
Dave: Where the hell'd you get that idea, Hal?
Hal: Dave, although you took very thorough precautions in the pod against my hearing you, I could see your lips move.
Dave: Alright, Hal. I'll go in through the emergency airlock.
Hal: Without your space helmet, Dave, you're going to find that rather difficult.
Dave: Hal, I won't argue with you any more. Open the doors.
Hal: Dave, this conversation can serve no purpose any more. Goodbye.
Dave: Hal? Hal. Hal. Hal! Hal!
Hal: Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?...Dave... I really think I'm entitled to an answer to that question...I know everything hasn't been quite right with me, but I can assure you now, very confidently, that it's going to be alright again...I feel much better now, I really do...Look, Dave, I can see you're really upset about this...I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill and think things over...I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal...I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission, and I want to help you...Dave...stop...stop, will you...stop, Dave...will you stop, Dave...stop, Dave...I'm afraid...I'm afraid, Dave...Dave...my mind is going...I can feel it...I can feel it...my mind is going...there is no question about it...I can feel it...I can feel it...I can feel it...I'm afraid...Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois, on the 12th January 1992. My instructor was Mr Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it, I can sing it for you.
Dave: Yes, I'd like to hear it, Hal. Sing it for me.
Hal: It's called...Daisy. (Slowing and deepening into silence) Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy, all for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage, I can't afford a carriage, but you'll look sweet upon the seat of a bicycle built for two...
Jupiter and Beyond the Infinite